Saturday Night Live/Dane Cook/The Killers

Dane Cook/The Killers
Season 32, Episode 1
Airdate	September 30, 2006
Production Number	1469
Written by
Directed by	Don Roy King
← 31x19 Kevin Spacey/Nelly Furtado	32x02 → Jaime Pressly/Corinne Bailey Rae
Saturday Night Live — Season Thirty-Two

Dane Cook/The Killers is the first episode of the thirty-second season of Saturday Night Live, and the six hundred eighth episode overall.

Guest Stars: Dane Cook (Host), The Killers (Musical Guest)

Special Guests: Brian Williams (Himself)

Episode Breakdown

• Eckstrom for Comptroller: Richard Eckstrom (Sudekis), Republican candidate for the South Carolina office of comptroller, is introduced by Mayor Sheila Bradshaw (Poehler) and supported by the local rotary club's head (Hader), a couple (Rudolph and Armisen) who held a party to introduce Eckstrom to the locals, the principal of the school he's speaking in (Wiig), the president of the school's Republican Club (Samberg) and finally President George W. Bush (Forte). Bush spends the comptroller's speech trying to talk to the principal and student, but they attempt to distance themselves from him.
• Dane Cook's Monologue: Cook performs stand-up comedy about people who always try to bring you down, how he can detect people lying to him, how every video in the world is already on YouTube and how all major car crashes are caused by people hoping to get their insurance money back by the next person hitting their car and being at fault.
• Homeland Security Refresher: Several airport security workers (Forte, Thompson, Armisen, Poehler and Rudolph) are briefed about the current airport security regulations for catching terrorists by representatives from the Department of Homeland Security (Cook and Sudekis). They particularly go over the loosening of restrictions of liquids and gels. They explain that as long as the passenger has only three ounces of liquid in a see-through bag, they can board a plane with the liquid or gel.
• People's Television of Venezuela: Hugo Chavez (Armisen) leads a discussion on several political issues with various anti-American leaders like Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (Hader), Pervez Musharraf (Hammond) and Kim Jong Il (Poehler). They talk about whether or not President George W. Bush is the devil, when they think America will fall and what makes President Bush so crazy. After several anti-American answers, they all agree that they'd rather live in America. Finally, Saddam Hussein (Cook) gives his commentary on the day's events in the style of Andy Rooney.
• SNL Digital Short - Cubicle Fight. A new employee (Hader) is forced to fight an existing employee (Cook) for his cubicle, like it's the Thunderdome, while the rest of the cast watches as employees, except for the boss (Sudekis). Steve, the existing employee, wins the fight by clubbing the new guy over the head with a magic eightball and stabbing him with a pair of scissors.
• Al Pacino Checks His Bank Balance: Al Pacino (Hader) struggles with the automated banking system to check the balance of his checking, but is forced to talk to customer service (Wiig) instead. She tells him that he has a negative balance in his checking, but over $12 million in his savings. Pacino has her transfer $620 into his savings so that he can buy one of the "space astronaut" mattresses and take care of his balance.
• When You Were Young: The Killers song.
• Weekend Update Pre-Show: Before Weekend Update actually starts, Brian Williams comes onto the set and assumes the role of Poehler's co-anchor for the news. She explains to him that they decided to go in a different direction when Meyers walks onto the set dressed in the same suit as Williams. Williams makes several passive-aggressive remarks before storming off the set.
• Weekend Update
  • Former President Bill Clinton (Hammond) and Condoleeza Rice (Rudolph) discuss his remarks on a news program in which he deferred responsibility over terrorism targeting the United States to the Bush administration. Clinton spends most of the discussion flirting with Rice and talking about their past relationship.
  • Virginia Senator George Allen (Sudekis) attempts to clear the air about allegations saying that he is a racist due to incidents where he used the word "Makaka" to refer to a man of Indian descent, use of racial slurs and distancing himself from his Jewish mother. He plays it off as him being a regular Southern boy saying words he made up before begrudgingly giving an apology.
  • Dustin Diamond (Samberg) talks about the sex tape he's making in an attempt to save his house from foreclosure with Meyers.
• Water Coolers: Two water deliverymen (Cook and Forte) attempt to cover for the fact that they've been stealing jugs of water meant for distribution when a regional manager (Wiig) stops by to investigate a complaint from customers about not receiving their water. She asks to see their delivery reports, which Forte looks for in the closet. However, the closet is full of empty water jugs which keep falling for over a minute without interruption. The two are fired and Forte breaks character to say that he has a friend at SNL who will probably use their conflict as a sketch and, if all else fails, he also has a friend at Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip and at 30 Rock.
• Bones: The Killers song.
• Farrah Fawcett for Ocean Save: Farrah Fawcett (Poehler) appeals to the viewer in behest of Ocean Save, an organization that, apparently, is attempting to save the ocean, although she isn't very clear about it. When the camera moves away, Fawcett breaks the fourth wall and attempts to follow it and winds up in a completely different sketch.
• Closing Time: Deuce (Cook) and T-Bird (Sudekis) close down the bar and kick everyone out of the bar without mercy.
• Geiko Insurance: Eric Butler (Sudekis) talks about losing control of his car and how Geiko helped him with support from Whitney Houston (Rudolph). Houston eventually just starts talking about a time when she caught Bobby Brown cheating on her.

Notes

"Live from New York, It's Saturday Night!"

• Jason Sudekis as Richard Eckstrom.

Music

• When You Were Young, performed by The Killers: The first single off The Killers' second album, Sam's Town, "When You Were Young" made it to the #1 spot on the Billboard U.S. Modern Rock Tracks chart.

• Bones, performed by The Killers: "Bones" was the second single off of Sam's Town, but was not released as a single until after this episode was aired. The song is notable for its music video, which was the first music video directed by Tim Burton.

Trivia

The Show

• Special Sketch: The sketch with Brian Williams was not aired as a consecutive part of the show. Instead, it was broadcast in the middle of a commercial break between The Killers' performance and the official beginning of Weekend Update.
• Logo: This was the first and only episode to use the season's first logo in the opening title sequence and bumper art. The logo was horizontally-styled, in contrast to the 1981-84 "square" type used in the next show and beyond. The initialism version of the logo ("SNL") was also used in the bumper art, but it, along with the full logo, was replaced with the third and final logo design when the show was rerun two weeks later. The same changes apply to the mid-break teases.

Quotes

• Forte: What if I am a passenger a passenger who does not have three ounces with me, but is confident I could produce three plus ounces on the flight?

Sudekis: You mean three ounces of a liquid?

Forte: Or a gel.

Cook: Stop!

• Sudekis: Let's just name a few more liquids.

Poehler: Root Beer

Rudolph: Sprite!

Armisen: Meatballs!

Cook: No.