King of the Hill/Dale Be Not Proud

Dale Be Not Proud
Season 8, Episode 14
Airdate	March 14, 2004
Production Number	8ABE11
Written by	Jonathan Collier
Directed by	Anthony Lioi
← 8x13 Cheer Factor	8x15 → Après Hank, le Deluge
King of the Hill — Season Eight

Dale Be Not Proud is the fourteenth episode of the eighth season of King of the Hill, and the one hundred sixty-third episode overall.

Starring: Mike Judge (Hank Hill, Boomhauer, Octavio), Kathy Najimy (Peggy Hill), Pamela S. Adlon (Bobby Hill, Timmy Croston), Brittany Murphy (Luanne Platter), Johnny Hardwick (Dale Gribble, Mike Soto), Stephen Root (Bill Dauterive)

Special Guest Voice: John Force (Himself)

Special Guest Voice: Larry Miller (Dr. Tabor)

Also Starring: Dennis Burkley (Principal Moss), Ashley Gardner (Nancy Gribble, Nurse), David Herman (Doctor, Alien Urine Salesman), Ashley Johnson (Emily)

Plot Overview

When funny car racer John Force needs a new kidney, Dale soon discovers he's a perfect match.

Meanwhile, Peggy helps Bobby as he does the school's morning announcements.

Notes

Stinger Quote

Peggy: Flapjacks! (rings cowbell)

Seen, But Not Heard

• Joseph Gribble

Quotes

• Dale: You know these funny cars go so fast that when the car hits the finish line the driver is actually younger than when he started.

• Bill: John Force is the greatest funny car racer ever! He's done more in a quarter mile than I've done in my whole life.

• Hank: So it's settled. We'll all go give blood together.

Dale: Count me out. The vast majority of unauthorised face removals happen to people in hospitals.

Hank: You disappoint me, Dale.

Dale: Get in line.

• Dale: That silent treatment won't work on me. I don't need you to talk to. I have my thoughts. (beat) I can't be alone with my thoughts! You've heard them!

• Hank: All of our blood was screened, tested, and catalogued into the computer--

Dale: Oh, God, not the master computer!

Hank: Uh, it looked like a Dell.

• Dale: But I - I need my kidney. It keeps my other kidney company.

• Dr Tabor: Mister Gribble, the odds of finding another match are one in 80,000.

Dale: You better get to it, then, eh, Doc? There's the phone book.

• Hank: Dang it, Dale. You're not even going to think about it? We're talking about John Force!

Dale: Not for long.

• Dale: If you want my kidney, I gotta get something in return.

Hank: Dale!

John Force: No, it's okay. What can I do for you?

Dale: First off, I reserve the right to call you 24 hours a day to prove to people I know you. I do not play favourites with my organs. If you take my kidney on vacation, my other organs go, too. And finally, I want you to put the Dale's Dead Bug on top of your race car.

John Force: Well, that thing's going to slow me down a bit.

Dale: Not as slow as if you're dead.

• Dale: You have to make sure nothing happens to me. That no one steals my brain, or, if they do, they replace it with one of equal or greater value.

• Nancy: I couldn't help noticing, sug, you're not eating any solids and you're only drinking clear fluids.

Dale: Oh, that's because I'm donating one of my kidneys to John Force tomorrow.

Nancy: What?!

Dale: Oh, did I not mention that?

Nancy: No!

Dale: I won't be home for three days. Love you. Well, gotta get shaved.

• Dale: (talking in his sleep) Nancy, what's Redcorn doing in our shower?

• Dale: Oh, God! They know I know! I'm in the network! Why - Why isn't my head wrapped in tinfoil?

Dr Tabor: Mister Gribble, we're going to need you to calm down. Look at me.

(nurse gives him a shot)

Dale: It's happening! The harvest has begun! How could you let this happen to me, Hank? I trusted you! I tru...

Hank: Sorry, Dale, I...

Dr Tabor: Mister Hill, you have nothing to feel guilty about. That was just some typical post-op dementia brought on by the anaesthesia. It was not the real Dale talking.

Hank: No, that was him.

• Dale: Hank, it sounds like you did everything right except giving away my kidney. And since I traded it for a bunch of kiddie toys, I... I guess we both let me down.

• Dale: So while you were me, did you sleep with Nancy?

Hank: No!

Dale: Too late!