How I Met Your Mother/The Scorpion and the Toad

The Scorpion and the Toad
Season 2, Episode 2
Airdate	September 25, 2006
Production Number	2ALH02
Written by	Chris Harris
Directed by	Rob Greenberg
Stream
← 2x01 Where Were We?	2x03 → Brunch
How I Met Your Mother — Season Two

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The Scorpion and the Toad is the second episode of the second season of How I Met Your Mother, and the twenty-fourth episode overall.

Starring: Josh Radnor (Ted Mosby), Jason Segel (Marshall Eriksen), Cobie Smulders (Robin Scherbatsky)

with Neil Patrick Harris (Barney Stinson)

and Alyson Hannigan (Lily Aldrin)

Guest Starring: Nicole Garza (Jenny), Natalie Garza (Jesse)

Co-Starring: Sundeep Ahuja (Dan), Ken Cosby (Cab Driver), Barry Finkel (Crazy Man), Lee Warren Jones (Waiter), Diane Mizota (Woman), Kelly Mullis (Paula), Lara Boyd Rhodes (Amy), Richard Wharton (Art Professor), Josh Wingate (Mike)

Uncredited: Bob Saget (Ted of 2030 (voice))

Plot Overview

While Marshall adjusts to bachelorhood, Lily is back in town after an amazing summer in San Francisco, but what really brought her back?

Marshall has finally gotten over being single after 9 years of being in a relationship with Lily, causing him to both check out Robin's ass and be brought under Barney's wing (booting Ted out as his usual victim). After Robin leaves the bar to go to her apartment, she runs into Lily, who has returned to New York.

While Robin and Lily catch up with one another, Barney has swindled Marshall into trolling for girls with him. Unfortunately for Marshall, Barney winds up stealing the girl that Marshall was talking to. The next day, Robin goes to Ted's apartment to fill him in on the fact that Lily was happy and that they went apartment hunting. Later that night, Marshall and Barney go to the bar again and once again Barney steals the girl out from under him with more magic.

Barney convinces Marshall that instead of going to the usual bar, they'll go to a college bar where Marshall will seem more intelligent and interesting. He agrees, but only after robbing him of all his magic tricks. Marshall succeeds at getting a girl's phone number, but once again, Barney steals it. Meanwhile, Ted and Robin get Lily drunk so she'll tell the truth about whether or not she misses Marshall. Although it seems like Ted will lose the "she's miserable" bet, he ultimately wins when she breaks down into tears over missing the apartment, which was a metaphor for Marshall.

Lily admits that her summer was terrible and that all she really wants is to get back together with Marshall. Ted tells her that if she called him, she could get him back without a problem but warns her that there can't be a "maybe" about it. Later that night (after Barney stole his date once again), Marshall and Lily run into each other. Although Lily asks him if they can get back together, Marshall says that they shouldn't because everything she said about why they shouldn't be together was true. They do, however, get along despite the problems they were facing, as evidenced by Marshall getting Lily to ruin Barney's date in the bar.

Trivia

Allusions and References

• The Scorpion and the Toad: The title of the episode (and the name of the college bar) refers to a fable often referred to as "Mr. Scorpion and Mr. Toad." In the fable a scorpion demands that a toad ferry him across the English Channel, to which the toad refuses because the scorpion is a known killer. The toad is convinced to take the scorpion across because the scorpion tells him that they would both die if he stung the toad. Midway across the channel, the scorpion stings the toad. When the toad asks why the scorpion doomed them both, the scorpion replies, "It is my nature."

Quotes

• Ted: She's miserable. She's realized she's made a huge mistake. Her and Marshall will be back together in a week. I love it!

Robin: Um, no. You just want Lily to be miserable. The truth is she's happy.

Ted: Trust me, I've known Lily for nine years.

Robin: Trust me! I'm a girl.

Ted: Yeah, but you're Canadian.

• Barney: (looking at the card with a girl's number on it) Sorry buddy, I'm taking this one too.

(Long pause.)

Marshall: I'll kill you!