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Queeg is the fifth episode of the second season of Red Dwarf, and the eleventh episode overall.
Guest Stars: Charles Augins (Queeg)
Everyone is hanging around in Lister's quarters. Cat is listening to an energetic reading of Tess of the d'Urbervilles; Rimmer is playing draughts/checkers with a scutter (and losing badly). Then Holly pops in ...
Holly: What's happenin' then dudes?
Lister: Oh, bug all.
Holly: Hang on. I've forgotten what I was gonna say now.
Rimmer: Well, it can't have been that important then, can it?
(just then a tremendous explosion rocks the ship)
Holly: That's it, yeah: Look out. A meteor is about to hit the ship.
When they reach the site of the damage, they find the hologram simulation suite filled with smoke and burning equipment. Lister helps make repairs by following Holly's directions.
When they are done, Lister notices one final cable that is still not connected to anything. Holly tells him that it joins up with the white cable. When Lister connects the cables, he is electrocuted and thrown across the room by an explosion. All Holly has to say for himself is, "... or is it the yellow cable?"
An unfamiliar face appears on one of the monitor screens. It is Queeg, the Red Dwarf backup computer. Due to Holly's gross negligence, Red Dwarf is now run by Queeg 500.
In short order everyone learns that Queeg is very stern, very formal, and very much goes by the book. He makes Rimmer excercise every day and study astro-navigation; Cat and Lister must now work for their food; Lister is put on a strict diet; and Holly is relegated to night watchman.
As Queeg is quizzing Rimmer, he pauses to yell at Lister and the Cat, "... you two suckers! Stop shirkin' and get workin'!"
About that time Holly, rolls in on his portable monitor. To everyone's dismay he addresses Queeg, "I challenge you to the game of your choice. May the better mind win." Queeg agrees: the winner gets command of Red Dwarf and the loser gets erased.
Queeg choses chess as his game, despite repeated attempts by Holly to get him to choose a simpler game. Holly loses.
When Holly comes to say goodbye, everyone realizes that they should have appreciated him more. As Holly is erased, he sings the song Goodbye to Love by The Carpenters. His voice fades out as he is singing, and we see the words "ERASE COMPLETE" on the monitor.
Seconds later, Queeg appears ...
Queeg: Okay suckers! Get this into your stupid, thick heads. There's only one thing I want to say to you.
Lister (morosely): What?
Queeg (in Holly's voice): What's happenin' dudes?
The face on the monitor changes from Queeg to Holly
Holly: We are talking jape of the decade ...
Holly: We are talking April, May, June, July, and August fool ...
Holly: Yes, that's right. I am Queeg.
Holly: Queeg never existed. It was me all along.
- This episode proves that even though Holly may seem like he is not in total control of his mental faculties, he can have moments of sheer brilliance! And he has a sense of humor.
- Rimmer tells Lister that he once had a friend named Porky Roebuck. They were in Space Scouts together as children. While on a survival outing, Porky betrayed him, and masterminded a plan to eat Rimmer.
Behind the Scenes
Allusions and References
- The name Queeg comes from the paranoid commander in The Caine Mutiny.
- When Holly says, "This is mutiny, Mr. Queeg ...", he is quoting a passage from Mutiny on the Bounty.
- When Holly comes up to Lister and the Cat as they are scrubbing the floor, he attempts to prove that his IQ is in fact 6000 and not just 6. As he rolls away, he can be heard whistling the theme music from the movie The Great Escape.
- As Holly trundles through the hallways toward his final showdown with Queeg, we hear a space-adapted version of the theme song from the 1952 film High Noon. The song includes the words "Do not forsake me, Oh my darlin' ...".
- Rimmer's legs wander off without him.
- Just after the ship is hit by an asteroid ...
Lister (to Holly): Is there any damage?
Holly: I dunno. The damage report machine's been damaged.
- After Lister is electrocuted, Rimmer has this to say to Holly:
Rimmer: You are a total, total ... A word has yet to be invented to describe how totally whatever-it-is you are, but you are one. And a total, total one at that.
- After he reveals that the whole episode has been a joke'
Holly: ... and the moral of the story is: Appreciate what you've got, because basically, I'm fantastic.
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