Outrageous Fortune/Ted West
From The TV IV
Ted is Wolf's father. He comes to stay with the family after he burns down his flat, by leaving some fat frying on the stove, when he goes for a quick trip to the local dairy. He is closest to Loretta of all his grandchildren.
- Grandpa: This is why the Wests have never been much good at what you might call actual jobs. Too much stress. Pretty soon you’ll start worrying about pointless shit like taxes. Then you wake up one morning and you’re one of them.
- Grandpa: I’ve shat better than you.
- Grandpa: (on peeing off the deck) At least I’m not charging for the car wash.
- Grandpa: (On Tracy’s arrival) The Viet Cong are here.
- Grandpa: (to Tracy) You were great in Charlie’s Angels.
- Grandpa: Life is shit.
Wolf: What’s pushed your button?
Grandpa: Being old and useless.
Wolf: Yeah, well, you get that.
Grandpa: That’s pretty f--king profound son.